Pennywise The Dancing Clown

Mike Argento: Congress gives clowns a bad name

Clowns.

The word comes up a lot whenever talk turns to the performance of our elected officials in their attempt to make this country the world's No. 1 source of unintentional comedy and/or tragedy. There is even a Facebook page titled, "There are more clowns in Washington, D.C., than all circuses combined!" Pundits and nitwits and wits everywhere haul out the C-word when they are pressed to describe the performance artists posing as politicians in our nation's capital.

You have to think, this is a great disservice to clowns.

"Amen," said Bob Smith.

Smith is a clown.

Not only is he a clown, he is chief clown with the White Rose Clown Club. That's his title, chief clown.

And as a clown, he is kind of offended that people would compare real clowns to the clowns in Washington. Clowns have some skills and perform a public service by entertaining, making balloon animals and stuffing themselves into those tiny cars. The clowns in Washington may be providing some entertainment for those among us who look to them for humor, but can they make a dog out of a couple of balloons?

Smith is a veteran clown. He's been putting on the make-up for 16 years, after a friend suggested that he become a clown. He's 69 and retired as a sixth-grade teacher in the Dover Area School District, a career that prepared him for clowndom. If you can keep the attention of a roomful of sixth-graders all day long, you can entertain a few kids for a couple of hours.

He and his fellow clowns perform all over - preschools, senior centers, the York Fairgrounds, the county commissioners' meeting once a year to note National Clown Week. They march in parades. They perform pretty much wherever they can. They used to perform at York Hospital, but no longer. The balloons they use contain latex and the hospital was concerned about the safety of its patients with allergies to it.

They aren't in it for the money. In fact, there is no money. They are strictly volunteer and non-profit. If someone gives them a tip or donation, they turn around and donate it to charity.

That alone puts them above the clowns in Washington.

Another thing that elevates your standard clown above the clowns in the Capitol is that it takes skill.

imgovigmi: pennywise dancing clown

They won't be any better off here.Instead of being kicked out fair and square, they will be made to decay on H1 visas for 15-20 years. Talk of choosing a rock over a hard place. Besides, the British MPs seem to at least understand what skilled immigration means - here they will have the pleasure of being grouped with meat-packers and grape-pickers who matter-of-factly walked across the border.

It

The Pyrotechnic Insanitarium, American Culture on the Brink

Landscape of fear, Stephen King's American Gothic

The Scream Queen's Survival Guide, Avoid Machetes, Defeat Evil Children, Steer Clear of Bloody Dismemberment, and Conquer Other Horror Movie Clichs

The 100 Best Movies You've Never Seen